Monday, January 30, 2012

Mindless Monday

Good Monday morning!

Today's Mindless Monday is a little more mindless than usual. In other words, I'm a little muddled.

Tornadoes will do that to you. Even if you're not the one directly hit.

RANDOMNESS #1 - Bev and family have moved (and are getting settled) into a nice home ten minutes from their old home. It has a huge fenced-in backyard which is perfect for Rusty, or as I like to call him, Cujo. There is more than enough room for a family of five to live comfortably for a few months while new housing is being arranged. Although it has been a horrible experience, they have been blessed.

Tommy, my brother-in-law, left the following message on Facebook yesterday afternoon: "I saw Jesus today! Just like I have every day for the last four days in all of the people who have selflessly given of their time and energy to help my family and me in the aftermath of the tornado. We have been so blessed with a close family, REAL friends and a church family that lives what they believe. To all of you who have so generously given, and to those who may have wanted to but couldn't... thank you from the bottom of our hearts. GOD WILL BLESS YOU!!!"

It's true. In the middle of true destruction, God's love poured out.

Amazing!

RANDOMNESS #2 - Things I've Learned While Raising Teens... A Humbling Experience - I told you I had learned many, many lessons over the last seven years of being a mother to teenagers. Some of the lessons have been funny... others painful. Many lessons have been too complicated for my simple brain. But the following lesson has almost brought me down on several occasions... because of my "planning" personality, you see.

Last Minute Plans - If you have known me two minutes, you know I am NOT a go-with-the-flow kind of chick. Go-with-the-flow absolutely flusters me to the point I cannot even enjoy the go-with-the-flow experience even if it is uber-fun and exciting.

I can never get past the part where the activity wasn't planned months in advance.

"Belinda. Would you like to go to lunch?" a friend will ask.

"Sure. Let me get my calendar. What day and time would you like to go?"

"Uh, I was going to pick you up in a couple of hours."

"Great. What day?" I continue to ask the pertinent questions.

"Today," my friend replies.

"Wow. Today?" I repeat to make sure I heard correctly.

"Yes. Have you got something else planned?" I have some good friends. They persist while others would probably have hung up three questions earlier.

Planned? Planned? Well, no I don't have anything planned. Tomorrow I have a dental appointment which has been planned for the past six months. Three days from now I have a breakfast date with Mikie which has been in the works five weeks. But today... Well, today I have nothing specific planned.

"I don't think I can get away today," I reply, slowly.

My friend, having known me for more than two minutes, comforts me in my time of "fluster."

"Okay. I know I sprung this on you at the last minute. I'll pick you up in two hours and 30 minutes, and we'll be gone 90 minutes. And we're going to eat at a place you like. I promise I'll give you more notice next time. Now will you PLEASE go to lunch with me?"

"Wow. This is all so sudden. But, yes. I will be happy to have lunch with you. Actually, I'm looking forward to it!" My friend knows this is not the case, but she is gracious and kind and still picks me up exactly two hours and 30 minutes later.

And we have a really good time... in spite of me!

The last minute plans of teenagers will be my final undoing, I'm afraid.

On Friday morning, I talk to or contact all three kids to ask about their weekend plans. MANY times, they answer with "I have nothing," or "I'm not sure yet."

Those two small sentences cause me great anguish. That means the weekend is totally left... UNPLANNED!

But I am forever hopeful. I plan and prepare a Friday night dinner (which can be refrigerated and saved for Saturday night... or Sunday lunch).

Roxie comes home. "I may or may not be meeting some friends tonight if it is okay with you and Dad."

"Who, when and where?" I ask.

"That's what I'm not sure of. I'll let you know when I get all the details."

Okay. That's LIMBO NO. 1.

Josh comes home. "I'm going to put in a couple of job applications and head to the strip mall to pick up (fill in the blank). I'll be home for dinner... I think."

Okay. That's LIMBO NO. 2.

Austin comes home. "I'm waiting to talk to Melia and then we'll nail down our plans. We may just stay over here and watch a movie, or we may go shopping or we may get a burger and go the movies. I just don't know yet."

Okay. That's LIMBO NO. 3.

All of these are fine. I want the kids to have friends and plans and weekend fun. I really, really do. That's what a mother of teenagers lives for... happy teens! It's our main goal because we know unhappy teens are hard to live with. Feel free to interchange the word "hard" in the last sentence with "impossible," "unbearable" and "miserable" as it relates to you and your teen(s).

As plans are being finalized, Mikie calls and asks, "What are we all doing tonight?"

I am unable to answer this question, and promise to call him as I learn more.

And this, my friends, is when I wish, wish, wish I was a go-with-the-flow Mother of Teenagers instead of an uber-structured Mother of Young Children... which do not exist any longer.

But God is doing a work in me... especially during the weekends of my life. The phrase, "You can't teach an old dog new tricks," doesn't necessarily ring true in my situation.

At 50 years of age, I am learning new tricks. They are called "breathing techniques," "scripture memorization" and "Michael Buble CDs."

When I die, I want the following on my headstone...

"She was a fine Christian woman, an uber-fantastic wife and an UTTERLY AWESOME mother of teenagers!"

Because in the end, no one argues with a headstone!

Have a great Monday. I hope you have a truly blessed day. I'll be back tomorrow with a banana pudding recipe that is out of this world! I'm making my second one today. (The first one was gone in two days! Two days!)

Take care, and I'll talk to you in the morning.

Sincerely,

The Enchanting Belinda and UTTERLY AWESOME Mother of Teenagers

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